Sick of the sound your iphone alarm makes every morning?
Of course you do. We all hate it.
And it’s so universal, that even if we hear someone else’s, we still have a Pavlovian response.
But what is about the sound of an alarm that makes us so miserable?
Is it the noise itself? Sure, it’s not pleasant to hear a blaring sound. But what we truly detest about the alarm is the association. Normally, when we hear that sound, we’ve been abducted from slumber. Plucked from our peaceful reveries. Kidnapped from our all too brief dream time. And it’s so sudden. There’s no warning. No countdown or cool down. One minute, you’re at the park, trying to catch a unicorn alligator hybrid so you can fly it to work because your car is in the shop. The next, you’re awake in winter darkness and still half wondering where you put Reginald the unigator’s harness. It takes a while to come back to reality.
What’s more, it takes a while to become functional. Because, when our sleep cycle is interrupted and we’re not waking organically as we do with the sun, we spend the day feeling less than rested. This is why the professionals will tell you it’s better to sleep in specific incremental levels to complete all the phases of snooze time. Even if you log less time sleeping like a log overall, it’s better to wake up on the end of a cycle than to start another and interrupt it. Usually, however, we don’t. It’s rare that said alarm matches up with that. So, then, what happens by day? You’re tired from your unfinished sleep. So, obviously, you reach for your Caribou coffee all day or something similar from the ubiquitous Emerald Mermaid. And what happens by night? Sleeplessness again because of the caffeine. It’s another delayed snooze, another unfinished sleep cycle, and another tired morning ushered in by that nasty ringing digital brick. Right? Right, but that doesn’t help me when I have to wake up at 4. So what’s the fix for that? How do we end the cycle – so to speak?
A great many of us must rise prior to our solar orb. So organically getting up with the sun’s not an option.
But you know what is?
A simulated sun…
That’s right.
It’s a light that slowly spends the first thirty minutes of your morning glowing from a rosy rising morning star to a bright white luminescence, filling your room, and taking you from witching hour to midday just like that. Ya know – like the sun – but much faster. Once you’re exposed to this simulated morning light, you naturally feel inclined to rise. Now, you know me. I don’t endorse dumb ideas. Granted, I’ll write about all of the various sleep hacks to be had. I’ll give them each their spotlight. But if I think something’s a waste of money and that you can do much better with something cheaper – you’re gonna hear about the economical option. Why? Because I don’t get paid to be a liar like some influencers and writers do.
So, with that said, I think this thing might just be worth the $99 they demand for it. (Even though I feel like you should just say it’s $100. You’re not fooling anyone with sacrificing a dollar to say it’s in the double digits…) Many an expert will tell you that the best option would be to naturally rise with sunlight. They actually did a study on this with people they took to the mountains who had no watches, alarms, or phones and they all rose at the same time with the sun, felt more rested, and became healthier. (Although if I could spend a week away from work, people, alarms, and technology, I probably would be too…) Bonus? For those diagnosed (or self diagnosed, whatever) with Seasonal Affective Disorder, this could be a game changer. It’s difficult to start your day in darkness, be stuck inside all day for the actual sunlit hours, and then experience early darkness again for your few hours of freedom before a brief nap prior to returning to your prison made of paychecks. This could help your mind feel more like you’re getting the extra photons you’re missing in the winter, while also naturally nudging you to get up. The literal only downside to this that I can think of is the fact that anytime I wake up before my alarm, I’m in a panic, thinking my alarm didn’t go off. Especially on my late days and weekends. With that being the only downfall, though, this thing (which, incidentally, is called the Lumie Bodyclock Rise 100 Wake-up Light, if you’re trying to find it specifically) is definitely going on the winter wish list. That is, unless one of you loyal readers can quote me a cheaper option. And then I’ll get that instead.
Pro-tip, though?
If you’re getting one too, I’d still set that annoying alarm…
Just in case.